A News Story, Written by M. Knight Shyamalonom

It starts out pretty good, what with the title alluding to a potential confrontation and all. Check this shit out, yo ...

Alleged car thief returns to scene of crime, then enters house


A man who allegedly stole an off-duty police officer’s personal car from the cop’s home early this morning returned to the scene of the crime and was caught wearing the officer’s police jacket.

This is where the tension starts to build.

Michael Reeder, 49, was arrested on suspicion of motor vehicle theft and burglary after he was found in Officer Ruben Crews’ home in the Patty Jewett area.

This sets a character and a location. Good, good ... tell us more. We're interested now.

Crews and his wife had gone looking for their stolen vehicle around 6 a.m. When they returned home, they saw the car in the driveway and that a window to the house was open.

Sweet. The story has come full circle, and in a moment the plot will be revealed after an amazingly intense confrontation:

The officer confronted Reeder, who was wearing Crews’ police jacket.

[eerie violins that get faster and louder, building up to the huge climax, which explodes with ...]

Both received minor injuries in a struggle. Reeder was taken to Penrose Hospital, treated for a head injury and released.

Reeder was booked into the El Paso County jail this afternoon.


Seriously? That's it? Just over like that?

No, it wasn't like it was bad, it was just ... I dunno ... okay, I guess. I mean, that's pretty much it anyway. No need to elaborate or anything.

It's just ten bucks. Huh.


This has been A News Story Written by M. Knight Shymallalong


  1. *blank stare*

    *throws popcorn at screen*

    *storms out*

    *steps in something sticky*

    *hopes it was soda*

  2. I cannot believe you would do that to your readers!

    You're right, the one really does look like Donatella!

    "WWKMIIDGHC" is brilliant!

    I like exclamation points!

  3. Sorry about all that, but I just had to share my disappointment with you, the audience.

    And the way things are going, I should just add "WWKMIDGHC" to every post.


Dance for me, my little puppets ...